The (Ice Cream) Birthday Cake

There are a number of lovely people where I work. Oh. You didn’t know I had a job (outside of being a Farmer’s Wife?). Well. I do. And I have for forever so long. You see, I am a nurse. And where I work as a nurse there are a number of lovely people, and one of them is having a birthday today. And what does one do when one of the loveliest of people is having a birthday you might ask? Simple. You make them an ice cream cake. And not just any ice cream cake—you make them chocolate ice cream cake coated in fudge sauce and salted caramel and have it sitting on a chocolate-almond butter cookie crumble (for those equally lovely people where I work who may want a slice of cake as well, but cannot because they are avoiding a certain thing called glu-ten).

Yes. That is just what you do.

And here is how you can do it, too:

First a double batch of fudge sauce is made (some to make that ice cream of the chocolate variety, and some to top the cake with later). To do that, a cup of sugar is needed, as well as a quarter cup of good cocoa powder, four tablespoons of butter, two of corn syrup, and a half cup of half and half along with a good dash of salt. This is all placed in a saucepan and stirred well over medium heat until it boils. And it is allowed to be boiled and stirred for about three minutes, at which time the pan is taken from the heat and three ounces of chopped good bittersweet chocolate is added and stirred in until all is smooth. Half of this delicious concoction is placed in a jar and put in the fridge for later use, while the other half is left where it is (for now).

Now. For the ice cream base: Three cups whole milk is placed in a large saucepan, along with two tablespoons corn starch, a half cup sugar, a quarter cup corn syrup. This is cooked and stirred over medium heat until all this thickened and bubbly. It is then removed from the stove and while it is still hot, two ounces of cream cheese is stirred in, along with that fudge deliciousness you’d put aside.  To this mixture, one and a half cups heavy cream is added, and the whole thing poured through a sieve (to get out anything that isn’t creamy) and into a bowl that has a cover for it—have fun finding that! The ice cream to be is put in the fridge until completely cool. When it is so, it’s placed into whatever means you have to make ice cream. I have an ice cream maker that is plugged in, but those salt and ice  varieties work just as well. But you simply must have one to continue at this point. I’m not going to lie to you and say just to put the mixture into the freezer and stir it every once and a while. To have good and proper ice cream made from scratch, you must have an ice cream maker. You simply must. And if I may add my opinion on the matter, I’d say it was a purchase long overdue.

Now. As I was saying. The mixture is poured into the ice cream maker and made as ice cream is, and once it is, it is carefully set into a gelatin mold as quickly as can be done (you don’t want to go to all that work only to have it melt on you, do your? No. I didn’t think so). But (again) this needs to have a lid–you know the kind I’m talking about don’t you? Good. Get yourself one of them—and if you don’t happen to have one, go pay a visit to your Grandma—she’s sure to have a pair or four and would be happy to share.

The gelatin mold is then placed in the freezer for safe keeping while we work on that crust. To make it, a third cup of honey is mixed with an equal amount of butter, and to that is added two tablespoons of good cocoa powder along with a cup and a half of ground almonds. This is all stirred together until it makes a fine crumble, which is poured out onto a parchmented baking sheet and placed in a preheated three-hundred-and-fifty-degree oven and left to bake for twelve minutes or so, checking it often. You’re nose will let you know when it’s done.

And when it is done, it is removed from the oven and set aside to cool, while the salted caramel is made. And this is how that is done: A cup of granulated sugar is placed in a sauce pan and set over medium heat. Along side on the counter (ready to be used in a moment’s notice) is a half cup of heavy cream, a teaspoon of salt and six tablespoons of butter. The sugar will begin to melt and you should be stirring it continuously as it does. It will turn golden brown, but just watch yourself There is only a second between golden brown loveliness and a burnt smoking pan. As soon as all that sugar is melted. The second, in fact, the butter is stirred in. It will sputter. It will object in every possible way, but keep stirring. I promise you, it will be okay. And once it is okay (aka, the butter and the sugar have become one), the pan is removed from the heat and the cream stirred in. There will be more sputtering, although not nearly as much as before, and, like before, the cream will join in with the sugar and the butter and become one thing, One glorious pan of caramel, to which is now added the teaspoon of salt, and whatever other flavors you may like—might I suggest a teaspoon of vanilla?

This, like the fudge, is placed in a jar and set in the fridge for when it will be needed.

About now that cookie crumb should be cool. To it is added two tablespoons of melted butter and the whole thing is stirred together until all the cookie crumb is coated. The ice cream cake is taken out of the freezer and the larger of the two lids is removed (the bottom one) and the moistened cookie crumb pressed over the base of the cake as quickly as can be, and once done, the whole thing is placed back in the freezer to set—I usually give it at least over night.

The next day (today, Kathy’s birthday) The gelatin mold is removed from the freezer and doused with warm water (on the outside) before the two lids are removed and the ice cream cake is set on a platter, with the fudge and salted caramel alongside (those may be warmed up by placed the open jars in a pan of simmering water for a bit).

And that, my friends, is how it is done.

Happy birthday Kathy! Cheers! Here’s to you! And many more!