Grammy’s Biscuits with Rhubarb Jelly

There’s a woman I know named Lori (waves hi) who just happens to work with me, and at that place of work, she just happened to mention that she is in charge of one breakfast for forty people at a place some fourteen hours away, in a kitchen she’d never been to before and what would I do? I thought and pondered and thought and pondered some more, and eventually proclaimed I would make biscuits rolled and cut and frozen and also some sausage gravy, also frozen, and I would bring some jam or jelly alongside (for those particular folks who for some reason don’t like their biscuits slathered in sausage gravy) and then all I would have to do that day is make some scrambled eggs, heat up the gravy, and bake the biscuits and waaalllaaa–a homemade breakfast for forty is served in under fifteen minutes using the most basic of kitchen paraphernalia. She agreed, but, alas, she, while an expert at cooking a great many things, has had a struggle with the ever-elusive biscuit. No problem, I said, My Aunt Mary is coming over this Friday (as she does once a month) and she loves a good project. We will make the biscuits for you. And so we did. Sixty-four in all to be exact–although my dear Lori, if you are reading this, you are only getting fifty-eight. We had to sample one or four, just to make sure they were alright.

Three cups of flour are placed in a bowl, along with four teaspoons of baking powder, three tablespoons of sugar, three quarter teaspoons of salt and cream of tarter. This is mixed together with a pastry blender, and once all is set, three quarters up of cold, salted butter cut in and continued to be cut in, in the way of that pastry blender until the butter is as small as peas. When that’s all done, a cup of whole milk is mixed with a tablespoon of white vinegar and set aside for about five minutes to curdle. Once it has, an egg is stirred in and the whole mixture added to the flour mixture and stirred and lightly kneaded until all becomes a big ball. That ball is placed on a flour-dusted counter where it is rolled out until about an inch thick. Now. Here is an important part. ONLY use a sharp vintage metal cutter. No other biscuit cutter will do. Trust me. Do you want high as the sky flaky biscuits? Then get yourself a vintage tin biscuit cutter. Cut those biscuits as close together as you can, but you can knead all the scraps together and roll it out again, and you should, for the sake of not wasting all that goodness, but there’s something about that first-rolled-biscuit. You can’t beat it. Now. For Lori, I placed hers on a parchment lined cookie sheet and put it in the freezer for about four hours, and then slid all that goodness into freezer bags for her to take down south next weekend. For us, I placed the biscuits on a parchmented baking tray and set it in a preheated four hundred and fifty degree oven where it puffed and rose and finally became a golden version of itself. For me and my biscuit cutter size, that is twelve minutes. Exactly. You might have to adjust your times a bit until you get to know your cutter, so those first times keep a close eye. That’s a hot oven. It doesn’t take long to get away from you. Now. We didn’t have any sausage gravy to slather ours with, but I did happen to have a bit of rhubarb jelly, which worked just as well.